Life After Quitting my Full-Time Job…
Remember two months ago when I quit my full time job in Tennessee and packed my bags to come home to North Carolina for the summer to bet on myself and go full time with my music?
I sure do.
And I’m really happy to say that it was the best decision I’ve made in a really long time.
Honestly, any decision was going to be better than staying stuck.
Pre-show photoshoot at Vineyard at the Old Place!
If you have no idea what I’m talking about you can catch up with the Bet On Myself Summer Blog Announcement ~HERE~
Long story short, the Bet On Myself Summer Series is a video series documenting this journey of betting on myself, whether that’s going full time with my music or trying to build a creative lifestyle brand that feels like a safe space for anyone who enjoys a softer life. After years of hustling to the point of misery, I’m testing the waters to see if I can find success in my own way and still live a life I love.
We’re already 5 episodes in and I’ve been splitting my time between the NC coast and my parent’s house out in the country.
Bet On Myself Summer Series Episode 1
(You can catch up on the Bet On Myself Summer Series Episodes ~HERE~)
The last two months have been a whirlwind. I’ve loved documenting not only the journey with my music, but also sharing pieces of my life that I have been missing terribly while in Tennessee; country life, being within three hours from the ocean, home projects with my parents, lunch on the porch with my mom. Not only have I been able to focus completely on being creative, writing songs, filming/editing videos, but I feel a sense of peacefulness that hasn’t been present in my life for a very long time.
For the last five years I have been stressing myself out trying to decide what life path to take. Do I stay in Tennessee? Do I move home? Do I move somewhere completely different? Do I get a different job? Maybe if I just try a little bit harder to be happy I’ll figure out the perfect combination and everything will just settle down, but none of my efforts brought that peace. If anything, the harder I tried the more I was left feeling exhausted and burned out.
The entertainment world is naturally an environment that breeds the following: competitiveness, comparison, toxic burn out, toxic relationships, a “user” mentality, scarcity mindset, fear of missing out to the point you’re never present in the moment, fear of not being enough, and most of all a tiny box mentality of how to go about attaining success that you’re not allowed to step outside of. All of these things were slowly taking a toll on me.
I hope whoever is reading this will understand something very important - I don’t want to bash the town I’ve lived in for the last ten years. I’ve met some amazing, talented, and kind people who have challenged me and loved on me in that town. For the sake of being fully transparent though, especially in a world where no one ever tells you the complete truth, there were a lot of negatives to living in Nashville. I didn’t even fully understand them until I was out of the bubble.
If you asked me what I have struggled with the most the last ten years of living in the Nashville I would say it’s been community. Feeling like everyone is your friend and no one is your friend. People are only nice to you when it benefits them. Do I think that mindset is isolated to Nashville alone? No. It’s everywhere. Do I think it’s worse in the bubble because it’s an entertainment industry town? Yes! Do I think people are intentionally being exclusive? No. I think most people don’t stop to even think about their intentions.
Here’s what I do know…
In the first month of being home in North Carolina, I was invited to more parties, dinners, hang outs, and gatherings than I’ve been invited to in the last year of living in Nashville. Not just by people I know in my home town, but by new friends I’ve made while singing on the coast - people I have no history with who welcomed me and opened their homes to me.
There is no right way to go about betting on yourself and chasing a dream. There’s no secret formula or cheat code. What works for someone else might not work for me. When I’m limited to a certain way of doing things just because it’s an industry standard I close myself off to the endless possibilities that could be a better option over all.
Making connections for the sake of knowing people will always be better than networking. I don’t think people in Nashville realize they’re filtering every interaction through he lens of what can I get out of it?, but the connections I’ve made in NC the last two months feel more genuine. More pure in nature.
It’s okay to outgrow what you thought you wanted. Do I still want to find success with my music and tour? Absolutely. Do I wanted to sell out shows and have people care about the art I make? Of course! But I used to think it had to look a certain way. I don’t really feel that way anymore.
These are the things I’ve been thinking on in the quiet moments of my day to day. I still don’t know where I’m going at the end of the summer. Thankfully, my family is super supportive and hasn’t been rushing me to make any decisions.
For now I’m celebrating my Bet On Myself Summer Wins.
My amazon commercial is out in the world!
My summer shows are fully booked. (With small additions to be made here or there!)
I recently matched my income to what I was making at my full time job. < that one is insane!!!
I owe it all to the amazing venues that have booked me this summer, the generous tippers at my shows, and the connections that fell into my lap with divine timing.
I’m still working a full 40hr work week (sometimes more!) but the work feels different. It’s feeding this part of my soul that needed the freedom to be creative. I was terrified at the beginning of May while I was scrambling to get shows booked and figure out a small income. Betting on yourself isn’t easy. It costs you comfort and security, but I can truly say that the bet feels like it’s paying off.
Two months in and I feel like a completely different person in the best way possible.
Go bet on yourself this summer!
xx Carson